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Selected Messages Book 2
When I first found myself in a state of helplessness I deeply regret-
ted having crossed the broad waters. Why was I not in America? Why
at such expense was I in this country? Time and again I could have
buried my face in the bed quilts and had a good cry. But I did not long
indulge in the luxury of tears.
I said to myself, “Ellen G. White, what do you mean? Have you
not come to Australia because you felt that it was your duty to go
where the conference judged it best for you to go? Has this not been
your practice?”
I said, “Yes.”
“Then why do you feel almost forsaken and discouraged? Is not
this the enemy’s work?”
I said, “I believe it is.”
I dried my tears as quickly as possible and said, “It is enough; I
will not look on the dark side any more. Live or die, I commit the
keeping of my soul to Him who died for me.”
I then believed that the Lord would do all things well, and during
this eight months of helplessness, I have not had any despondency or
doubt. I now look at this matter as a part of the Lord’s great plan, for
the good of His people here in this country, and for those in America,
and for my good. I cannot explain why or how, but I believe it. And I
am happy in my affliction. I can trust my heavenly Father. I will not
doubt His love. I have an ever-watchful guardian day and night, and I
will praise the Lord, for His praise is upon my lips because it comes
from a heart full of gratitude—
Letter 18a, 1892
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[235]
Meditations Through Days of Affliction
Prayer and Anointing—but Not Instantly Healed
May 21, 1892—The trying, almost sleepless night is ended. Yes-
terday afternoon Elder [A. G.] Daniells and his wife, Elder [G. C.]
Tenney and his wife, and Brethren Stockton and Smith came to our
house at my request to pray that the Lord would heal me. We had a
most earnest season of prayer, and we were all much blessed. I was
relieved, but not restored. I have now done all that I can to follow the
Bible directions, and I shall wait for the Lord to work, believing that