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Counsel to a Bride and Groom, July 16
Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall
cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.
Genesis 2:24
.
You, my children, [
from a letter by Ellen White to her son Edson and
wife, soon after their marriage
] have given your hearts to one another;
unitedly give them wholly, unreservedly to God. In your married life seek
to elevate one another. Do not come down to common, cheap talk and
actions. Show the high and elevating principles of your holy faith in your
everyday conversations and in the most private walks of life. Be ever
careful and tender of the feelings of one another. Do not, either of you,
for even the first time, allow a playful, bantering, joking censuring of one
another. These things are dangerous. They wound. The wound may be
concealed, nevertheless the wound exists and peace is being sacrificed
and happiness endangered....
My son, guard yourself and in no case manifest the least disposition
savoring of a dictatorial, overbearing spirit. It will pay to watch your
words before speaking. This is easier than to take them back or efface
their impression afterward.... Ever speak kindly; do not throw into the
tones of your voice that which will be taken by others as irritability.
Modulate even the tones of your voice. Let only love, gentleness, and
mildness be expressed in your countenance and in your voice. Make it
a business to shed rays of sunlight, but never leave a cloud. Emma will
be all to you you can desire if you are watchful and give her no occasion
to feel distressed and troubled and to doubt the genuineness of your love.
You yourselves can make your happiness or lose it. You can by seeking to
conform your life to the Word of God be true, noble, elevated, and smooth
the pathway of life for each other....
Yield to each other. Edson, yield your judgment sometimes. Do not be
persistent, even if your course appears just right to yourself. You must be
yielding, forbearing, kind, tenderhearted, pitiful, courteous, ever keeping
fresh the little courtesies of life, the tender acts, the tender, cheerful,
encouraging words. And may the best of heaven’s blessings rest upon you
both, my dear children, is the prayer of your mother.
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