Hour of Bereavement
119
Vows to Carry On After Husband’s Death
During this severe attack of sickness [experienced in Oakland,
California, in 1888] I had vividly brought to my remembrance the
experience I passed through when my husband was dying. I prayed
with him in my great feebleness on that occasion. I sat by his side
with his hand in mine until he fell asleep in Jesus. The solemn vows I
there made to stand at my post of duty were deeply impressed upon my
mind—vows to disappoint the enemy, to bear a constant, earnest appeal
to my brethren of the cruelty of their jealousies and evil surmisings
which were leavening the churches. I would appeal to them to love
[164]
one another, to keep their hearts tender by the remembrance of the
love of Jesus exercised toward them, in what He did for them. And He
said, “Love one another, as I have loved you” (
John 15:12
). I never
can express with pen or voice the work that I discerned was laid out
before me on that occasion when I was beside my dying husband. I
have not lost the deep views of my work, as I sat by the bed of my
husband with his dying hand in mine.—
Manuscript 21, 1888
.
Ellen White Reflects on James White’s Death
After my husband died, one of our brethren, who thought a great
deal of him, said, “Do not let them bury him, but pray to the Lord that
He may bring him to life again.” I said, “No, no, although I realize my
great loss, I will not do this,” I felt that he had done his work. No one
but myself knew how great a load he had carried in the efforts we had
put forth to advance the truth. He had done the work of three men.
Night after night, at the beginning of our work, when advancement
seemed to be hindered on every hand, he would say, “Ellen, we must
pray. We must not let go until we realize the power of God.” He would
lie awake for hours, and say, “Oh, Ellen, I am so afflicted. Will you
pray for me, that I may not fail or be discouraged.” Together we offered
up our prayers, with strong crying and tears, until from his lips came
the words, “Thank the Lord; He has spoken peace to me. I have light
in the Lord. I will not fail. I will press the battle to the gates.” Would
I have him suffer all this over again? No, no. I would in no case call
[165]
him from his restful sleep to a life of toil and pain. He will rest until
the morning of the resurrection.