Chapter 50—Personal Experience
September 20, 1860, my fourth child, John Herbert White, was
born. When he was three weeks old, my husband felt it to be his duty
to travel. It was decided at the Conference that Brother Loughborough
should go west and he go east. A few days before they were to leave,
my husband was greatly depressed in mind. At one time he thought
he would give up the journey, yet he feared to do so. He felt that he
had something to do, but was shut in by clouds of darkness. He could
not rest or sleep. His mind was in continual agitation. He related the
state of his mind to Brethren Loughborough and Cornell, and bowed
before the Lord with them to seek counsel of Him. Then the clouds
parted, and the clear light shone. My husband felt that the Spirit of the
Lord was directing him west and Brother Loughborough east. After
this they felt clear as to their duty and moved accordingly.
In my husband’s absence we prayed that the Lord would sustain
and strengthen him, and obtained the assurance that He would go with
him. About one week before he was to visit Mauston, Wisconsin, we
received letters for publication from Sister G purporting to be visions
given her of the Lord. As we read these communications, we felt
distressed; for we knew that they were not from the right source. And
as my husband knew nothing of what he was about to meet at Mauston,
we feared he would be unprepared to meet the fanaticism, and that it
would have a discouraging influence upon his mind. We had passed
through so many such scenes in our early experience, and had suffered
so much from unruly, untamable spirits, that we dreaded to be brought
in contact with them. I sent in a request for the church at Battle Creek
to pray for my husband, and at our family altar we earnestly sought
the Lord in his behalf. With brokenness of spirit, and many tears, we
tried to fasten our trembling faith upon God’s promises, and we had
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the evidence that He heard us pray and that He would stand by my
husband and impart to him counsel and wisdom.
While looking in the Bible for a verse for Willie to commit to
memory to repeat in the Sabbath school, this scripture arrested my
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