True Benevolence
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from her; you resent anything she says that has the appearance of
crossing your track.
Your sister has a positive temperament. She has a work to do for
herself in this respect. She should be more yielding, but you must
not expect to exert a beneficial influence over her while you are so
exacting and so lacking in love and sympathy toward one who bears to
you the close relationship of a sister and is also united with you in the
faith. You have both erred. You have both given room to the enemy,
and self has had much to do with your feelings and actions in regard
to each other.
Sister F, you have an inclination to dictate to your husband, your
sister, and to all around you. Your sister has suffered very much in
her mind. This she could have borne had she surrendered herself
to God and trusted in Him, but God is displeased with your course
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toward her. It is unnatural and all wrong. She is no more unyielding
in her disposition than you are in yours. When two such positive
temperaments come in contact with each other, it is very bad for both.
You should each be converted anew and transformed into the divine
likeness. You would better err, if you err at all, on the side of mercy
and forbearance than that of intolerance.
Mild measures, soft answers, and pleasant words are much better
fitted to reform and save, than severity and harshness. A little too much
unkindness may place persons beyond your reach, while a conciliatory
spirit would be the means of binding them to you, and you might
then establish them in the right way. You should be actuated by
a forgiving spirit also, and give due credit to every good purpose
and action of those around you. Speak words of commendation to
your husband, your child, your sister, and to all with whom you are
associated. Continual censure blights and darkens the life of anyone.
Do not reproach the Christian religion by jealousy and intolerance
toward others. This will but poorly recommend your belief to them.
No one has ever been reclaimed from a wrong position by censure
and reproach, but many have thus been driven from the truth and have
steeled their hearts against conviction. A tender spirit, a gentle and
winning deportment, may save the erring and hide a multitude of sins.
God requires us to have that charity that “suffereth long, and is kind.”
The religion of Christ does not require us to lose our identity of
character, but merely to adapt ourselves, in some measure, to the