Responsibilities of Married Life
45
In the training of a child there are times when the firm, matured
will of the mother meets the unreasoning, undisciplined will of the
child. At such times there is need of great wisdom on the part of the
mother. By unwise management, by stern compulsion, great harm may
be done the child.
Whenever possible, this crisis should be avoided; for it means a
severe struggle for both mother and child. But once such a crisis is
entered into, the child must be led to yield its will to the wiser will of
the parent.
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The mother should keep herself under perfect control, doing noth-
ing that will arouse in the child a spirit of defiance. She is to give no
loud-voiced commands. She will gain much by keeping the voice low
and gentle. She is to deal with the child in a way that will draw him to
Jesus. She is to realize that God is her Helper; love, her power. If she
is a wise Christian she does not attempt to force the child to submit.
She prays earnestly that the enemy shall not obtain the victory, and,
as she prays, she is conscious of a renewal of spiritual life. She sees
that the same power that is working in her is working also in the child.
He becomes more gentle, more submissive. The battle is won. Her
patience, her kindness, her words of wise restraint, have done their
work. There is peace after the storm, like the shining of the sun after
rain. And the angels, who have been watching the scene, break forth
into songs of joy.
These crises come also in the life of husband and wife, who,
unless controlled by the Spirit of God, will at such times manifest the
impulsive, unreasoning spirit so often manifested by children. As flint
striking flint will be the conflict of will with will.
My brother, be kind, patient, forbearing. Remember that your wife
accepted you as her husband, not that you might rule over her, but that
you might be her helper. Never be overbearing and dictatorial. Do not
exert your strong will power to compel your wife to do as you wish.
Remember that she has a will and that she may wish to have her way
as much as you wish to have yours. Remember, too, that you have the
advantage of your wider experience. Be considerate and courteous.
“The wisdom that is from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle,
and easy to be entreated, full of mercy and good fruits.”
James 3:17
.
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One victory it is positively essential for you both to gain, the victory
over the stubborn will. In this struggle you can conquer only by the