Treatment of the Erring
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Do not tell others of the wrong. One person is told, then another, and
still another; and continually the report grows, and the evil increases,
till the whole church is made to suffer. Settle the matter “between thee
and him alone.” This is God’s plan. “Go not forth hastily to strive,
lest thou know not what to do in the end thereof, when thy neighbor
hath put thee to shame. Debate thy cause with thy neighbor himself;
and discover not a secret to another.”
Proverbs 25:8, 9
. Do not suffer
sin upon your brother; but do not expose him, and thus increase the
difficulty, making the reproof seem like a revenge. Correct him in the
way outlined in the Word of God.
Do not suffer resentment to ripen into malice. Do not allow the
wound to fester and break out in poisoned words, which taint the minds
of those who hear. Do not allow bitter thoughts to continue to fill your
mind and his. Go to your brother, and in humility and sincerity talk
with him about the matter.
Whatever the character of the offense, this does not change the
plan that God has made for the settlement of misunderstandings and
personal injuries. Speaking alone and in the spirit of Christ to the
one who is in fault will often remove the difficulty. Go to the erring
one, with a heart filled with Christ’s love and sympathy, and seek to
adjust the matter. Reason with him calmly and quietly. Let no angry
words escape your lips. Speak in a way that will appeal to his better
judgment. Remember the words: “He which converteth the sinner
from the error of his way shall save a soul from death, and shall hide a
multitude of sins.”
James 5:20
.
Take to your brother the remedy that will cure the disease of disaf-
fection. Do your part to help him. For the sake of the peace and unity
of the church, feel it a privilege as well as a duty to do this. If he will
hear you, you have gained him as a friend.
All heaven is interested in the interview between the one who
has been injured and the one who is in error. As the erring one
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accepts the reproof offered in the love of Christ, and acknowledges
his wrong, asking forgiveness from God and from his brother, the
sunshine of heaven fills his heart. The controversy is ended; friendship
and confidence are restored. The oil of love removes the soreness
caused by the wrong. The Spirit of God binds heart to heart, and there
is music in heaven over the union brought about.