178
Daughters of God
Courtship and Marriage Serious Step
Ellen White’s grandniece, Addie Walling, was like a daughter to
her. A distant cousin of Addie’s apparently was interested in courting
her. Mrs. White outlined her reasons for her lack of enthusiasm for
such a courtship
.
Since writing the foregoing I received a letter from you that has
relieved me somewhat, but I am still some troubled. I think Reuben
[Tapley]—I hope that there is no attachment between you. I should
feel very sad if you had given him any decided encouragement. I
like Reuben. I consider him an honest-hearted young man, but not
one I would want to give you in marriage to for several reasons. One
is, he is a consumptive, of a consumptive family, and I know too
well what it is to have to battle with this terrible disease. We buried
Nathaniel and Annie White with consumption. We buried Lumen
Masten, foreman of the office, with consumption. We buried Robert
Harmon, my next oldest brother, with consumption. We buried Sarah
Belden with consumption.
[190]
I would not favor, as you regard health and happiness, your con-
necting with one who is predisposed to consumption. His mother has
escaped consumption because of a scrofulous swelling in her side.
She has no health, but is liable to die any time. His mother’s father,
Samuel McCann, died of the long, lingering consumption, and my
sister Harriet, his wife, took it of him, and her suffering was extreme.
She died. Sarah, the eldest daughter, died of consumption. Melville,
the next-eldest son, died of consumption. Lucy Ellen next died of
consumption. Mary, the next, died of consumption, and only two of
the children now live. It is the worst kind of consumption, and we feel
deeply the need of care in this matter of connecting our interest with
those whose blood is tainted with this dread destroyer.
As soon as I looked upon Reuben I knew he was marked. He will
not live long. His slim neck, his large head, tell the painful story that
his life is short. Now, Addie, there is still a more painful side to this
question. While they are having a feeble hold on life, only one of
this large family was religiously inclined; that was Sarah. Lucy Ellen
made no preparation for heaven till on her deathbed; then with her
expiring breath she called upon God. Melissa is religious. She has had
all the light upon the Sabbath, yet has not kept it. This is Reuben’s