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Testimonies for the Church Volume 3
manner that we forgive those who trespass against us. But few realize
the true import of this prayer. If those who are unforgiving did com-
prehend the depth of its meaning they would not dare to repeat it and
ask God to deal with them as they deal with their fellow mortals. And
yet this spirit of hardness and lack of forgiveness exists even among
brethren to a fearful extent. Brother is exacting with brother.
Peculiar Trials
The position that my husband has so long occupied in the cause
and work of God has been one of peculiar trials. His adaptation to
business and his clear foresight have led his ministering brethren to
drop responsibilities upon him which they should have borne them-
selves. This has made his burdens very great. And while his brethren
have not taken their share of the burdens, they have lost a valuable
experience which it was their privilege to obtain had they exercised
their minds in the direction of caretaking, of seeing and feeling what
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must be done for the upbuilding of the cause.
Great trials have been brought upon my husband by his ministering
brethren’s not standing by him when he most needed their help. The
disappointment he has repeatedly felt when those whom he depended
upon failed him in times of greatest need has nearly destroyed his
power to hope and believe in the constancy of his ministering brethren.
His spirits have been so wounded that he has felt justified in being
grieved, and he has allowed his mind to dwell upon discouragements.
This channel of darkness God would have him close, for he is in danger
of making shipwreck here. When his mind becomes depressed, it is
natural for him to bring up the past and dwell upon his past sufferings;
and unreconciliation takes hold upon his spirits, that God has suffered
him to be so beset with trials unnecessarily brought upon him.
The Spirit of God has been grieved because he has not fully com-
mitted his ways to God and trusted himself entirely in His hands, not
allowing his mind to run in the channel of doubt and unbelief in regard
to the integrity of his brethren. In talking doubts and discouragements
he has not remedied the evil, but has weakened his own powers and
given Satan advantage to annoy and distress him. He has erred in talk-
ing out his discouragements and dwelling upon the unpleasant features
of his experience. In thus talking he scatters darkness but not light. He