Stepmother
203
jewels are ruined. Love, manifestation of affection, is not a part of
your discipline....
You are making the lives of those dear children very bitter, espe-
cially the daughter’s. Where is the affection, the loving caress, the
patient forbearance? Hatred lives in your unsanctified heart more than
love. Censure leaps from your lips more than praise and encourage-
ment. Your manners, your harsh ways, your unsympathizing nature,
are to that sensitive daughter like desolating hail upon a tender plant;
it bends to every blast until its life is crushed out, and it lies bruised
and broken.
Your administration is drying up the channel of love, hopefulness,
and joy in your children. A settled sadness is expressed in the counte-
nance of the girl, but, instead of awakening sympathy and tenderness
in you, this arouses impatience and positive dislike. You can change
this expression to animation and cheerfulness if you choose....
Children read the countenance of the mother; they understand
whether love or dislike is there expressed. You know not the work you
are doing. Does not the little sad face, the heaving sigh welling up
from a pressed heart in its yearning call for love, awaken pity
Results of Undue Severity—Some time ago I was shown the case
of J. Her errors and wrongs were faithfully portrayed before her; but in
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the last view given me I saw that the wrongs still existed, that she was
cold and unsympathizing with her husband’s children. Correction and
reproof are not given by her for grave offenses merely, but for trivial
matters that should be passed by unnoticed. Constant faultfinding
is wrong, and the Spirit of Christ cannot abide in the heart where it
exists. She is disposed to pass over the good in her children without a
word of approval, but is ever ready to bear down with censure if any
wrong is seen. This ever discourages children and leads to habits of
heedlessness. It stirs up the evil in the heart and causes it to cast up
mire and dirt. In children who are habitually censured there will be a
spirit of “I don’t care,” and evil passions will frequently be manifested,
regardless of consequences....
Sister J should cultivate love and sympathy. She should manifest
tender affection for the motherless children under her care. This would
2
Testimonies For The Church 2, 56-58
.