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The Ministry of Healing
without expression. Let not the heart of one connected with you
starve for the want of kindness and sympathy.
Though difficulties, perplexities, and discouragements may arise,
let neither husband nor wife harbor the thought that their union
is a mistake or a disappointment. Determine to be all that it is
possible to be to each other. Continue the early attentions. In every
way encourage each other in fighting the battles of life. Study to
advance the happiness of each other. Let there be mutual love,
mutual forbearance. Then marriage, instead of being the end of love,
will be as it were the very beginning of love. The warmth of true
friendship, the love that binds heart to heart, is a foretaste of the joys
of heaven.
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Around every family there is a sacred circle that should be kept
unbroken. Within this circle no other person has a right to come. Let
not the husband or the wife permit another to share the confidences
that belong solely to themselves.
Let each give love rather than exact it. Cultivate that which is
noblest in yourselves, and be quick to recognize the good qualities
in each other. The consciousness of being appreciated is a wonderful
stimulus and satisfaction. Sympathy and respect encourage the
striving after excellence, and love itself increases as it stimulates to
nobler aims.
Neither the husband nor the wife should merge his or her indi-
viduality in that of the other. Each has a personal relation to God. Of
Him each is to ask, “What is right?” “What is wrong?” “How may
I best fulfill life’s purpose?” Let the wealth of your affection flow
forth to Him who gave His life for you. Make Christ first and last
and best in everything. As your love for Him becomes deeper and
stronger, your love for each other will be purified and strengthened.
The spirit that Christ manifests toward us is the spirit that hus-
band and wife are to manifest toward each other. “As Christ also
hath loved us,” “walk in love.” “As the church is subject unto Christ,
so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything. Husbands,
love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave
Himself for it.”
Ephesians 5:2, 24, 25
.
Neither the husband nor the wife should attempt to exercise over
the other an arbitrary control. Do not try to compel each other to
yield to your wishes. You cannot do this and retain each other’s love.